Boys -how not to do it!

Browsing my usual dating sites today and attracted the attention of a man. Got me thinking about first messages and how you have to try and be interesting and stand out. Now there are some things that are boring on a first message
"Hi- you look nice. How are you?"
Not really gonna grab my attention and make me think you actually bothered to read my profile!
So I'm all for new and varied ways that a guy tries to impress you with his first message. Today though I received one from this guy that went the other way:

"Hi, I am Mike, you look very naughty lady...lol
I love drinking red wine and chill...
And I like tattoos, have you got any in private parts too?lol..
Perhaps we can go out for a drink?"

My reply- straight and to the point
"Oh dear"

Honestly it actually wasn't the worst I have been asked- try this for size
"If a stranger asked you to strip naked and sit on his face and fart on him what would you do?"

I swear that's a message I received from a guy on line I had never spoken to before in my life! Had to have a chuckle. But boys/men however you try to  impress me or any other ladies do not start with that or any other questions about her private parts or her favourite position! Well not unless she states on her profile she wants strangers to talk dirty to her straight off and is looking for something shallow that only lasts one night!