Serious side to Bonnie.

Its been a while since my last blog. That's not to say life hasn't been interesting believe me ! But sometimes even this blogger wants to keep things private and not tell the world every detail of her life. But who knows maybe some time in the future I will share all with the world! I have to be careful as my parents read this !

"Will you ever come off the naughty step Bonnie ?"

Blogging about my dating life has certainly raised a smile on some peoples faces, and has helped me understand more about me, men and relationships. Its been fun looking back at some of the incidences and I am always conscious not to tarnish every man with the same brush. Because as you speak to more guys you realise some women out there are just as bad!

But then this blog can cause a few raised eyebrows. I don't tend to tell every guy I speak to that I write about my dating life. Some guys get scared off, but to be fair no one gets named (no law suits here!) and they only need to worry about being named and shamed so to speak if they do anything seriously out of line, or ridiculous! Although sometimes it worries me that ex boyfriends from my distant past will read this blog, recognise themselves and not be too happy about it being read by strangers ! Oh well ho hum - a woman scorned and all that!

But it is nice when I meet a new "match" to be able to come clean and let him appreciate my ramblings. Its great meeting someone with an open mind and who accepts that we all have a past, checkered or murky or squeaky vanilla clean.

 That's what makes us who we are now. We have all been molded, influenced and affected by even the smallest of details from life in general not just relationships. From parents to friends, we take on board everybody's actions and reactions to whats acceptable behaviour and what is not. I find myself ever aware now that as my daughter is approaching the age of 16 that life begins to change and pressures from peers can influence every decision she makes, good or bad. I hope that she feels able to talk to me about any issue or queries she has. I have always been open and honest with her and try not to preach too much on what is right and wrong in relationships. She has to find her own way and make her own mistakes to learn from. My own mothers statement of "shes only doing what you did at that age" will no doubt come back to haunt me !  I'm sure at some stage I will be repeating another one of my mums legendary comments to my own daughter "I'd rather know where you are then discover you been with a boy in a bush somewhere"
And yes I could have died with embarrassment when she said it !






Blimey that was deep for me ! So I shall leave you with a small tale I heard from a friend to lighten the mood and make you all smile:

A friend I know had a discussion with a boy she knew. He had met a new girl and things were rather serious. He mentioned she was a vegetarian and he was a bit put out by this. When asked why he replied "well she wont give me a blow job as she says no meat will ever pass into her mouth"

Age is a problem

I hadnt planned on writing this as my next blog but a moment ago a guy just gave me all the proof I needed.

As much as most people love the idea of a toy boy the reality falls far too short. I get a fair amount of interest from young men in their twenties. Which yes can give the ego a bit of a boost. But the majority of these "men children" have no idea how to talk to a real woman. They think by talking dirty and telling you how much of a sex maniac they are it guarantees them a date. Okay there are a few women out there who are frustrated and would happily take these boys to bed. But my profile clearly states Im not interested in eating them alive ! The best way to show you an example of what I have to put up with is below. This is the actual transcript of what this 25 year old sent- from his initial contact :

Bigbeads87 says:

Hello xx

Your not 38 xx

bon

Hiya Im good hows you?

I am 38 I promise!

Bigbeads87 says:

Wow u look great I thought u was 28 tops. How r u anyway? X

bon

Im a tad bit older than you!lol! Im ok thanks. Home from work so thats always a bonus

Bigbeads87 says:

Monday over and done with lol. Age just a number. U been single long? Xx

bon

2 years! seems far too long to me

Bigbeads87 says:

snap. So met anyone of here before? X

bon

met one guy, from this site anyway. I usually use another one, but getting bored with that one.

How about you?

Bigbeads87 says:

What the other one? I only been on here a,few days.... Xx

bonbno74 says:

Yes the other Site.

is 25 young for u.....  x

bon:

maybe a tad too young, when I have a daughter who is 14!

Bigbeads87 says:

can we forget the ages..... X

bon:

we can for now. but it may come back to haunt you!

Bigbeads87 says:

What u mean? ....  x

bon:

well we can chat but somewher down the line I think it will play a part

Bigbeads87 says:

Well depends if u like to f**ked hard and deep  x

bon says:

and with that you just ruined any chance of getting the best f**k of your life so to speak!

Bigbeads87 says:

Really u didn't seemed to keen lol. What do u do for work? X

bon says:

look Im not looking for a f@@k buddy and feel pretty dam insulted that within 3 messages thats what you came out with. YOU just showed yourself up to be a young imature boy. Now I suggest you go find someone on your level, or learn how to speak to ladies properly

Bigbeads87 says:

Cheer up

Xx

bon:

Hun Im more than smiley.

Bigbeads87 says:

Good . Im bad 

bon:

believe me Im the queen at being bad- but I dont expect to be treated like a walking vagina

Bigbeads87 says:

Cool. So what do u hate doing? Xx

bon

Im sorry but I dont see the point of carrying this conversation on anymore

Bigbeads87 says:

well do u want to meet up? X

bon

with a man not a boy sorry

He just didn't get the hint did he?! After that he still carried on and gave me his number, told me his real name and told me to contact him if I wanted a good seeing to or any electrical work done!

Give me strength! 

Loving yourself

Forgive me Blog followers for I have sinned. Its been nearly a month since my last blog and I know you are all waiting patiently for the next dating disaster to hit your screens! Sorry- its unforgivable I know, but to be fair I had a computer malfunction so for a week or so I had no way of composing this.
Well I'm back now with a new story. Although today isn't about a bad horrific date or a funny on line story. Its just about me and my opinion on a few things.
Although saying that there is a funny story that starting my whole rambling thoughts off. This weekend just gone I found myself at a family function- my youngest nephews Christening. A lovely family day where unlike at a wedding you dont feel that singled out for not being in a couple. During the afternoon my wonderful mother called me over to talk to some of my brothers old school buddies. She was telling them all about her daughters dating blog and my disasters. Not a bad start, until my mother uttered this fateful sentence (although I'm guessing she will deny saying this!)
"The problem  with Bonnie is that when men she meets find out shes a psycho it scares them off"
I kid you not! That was the actual word she used! I was gobsmacked! My mother calling me  a psycho! It took a few moments for me to realise that wasn't the word she meant to use and all was quickly corrected. Her mouth and brain weren't in sync with each other and she had insulted her daughter in error.
But it got me thinking- maybe I am just misunderstood. I honestly don't think 'Im hard work to get on with, I'm not a demanding princess, nor am I high maintenance (although I am prone to the odd mood swing or temper tantrum but as a female I  am allowed to have those!)I'm your typical girl next door type, who likes the countryside, nights out with friends, a good giggle and a nice hug. Okay I do have the odd trait thats a bit bolder than most, but thats what makes me Bonnie. Im unique. And so is everyone else.
And that is why I am happy. Im happy being Bonnie- single, dating, in a relationship or otherwise. I like how I am, I like me. A lot of people don't like themselves or haven't got around to finding out about themselves, which is why they arent happy in their relationships. How can you expect someone to love you when you don't love yourself. You have to know what you want in life to find the right person or people to travel the road with you. Don't get me wrong, Im still learning what I want from life, and I still will change or adapt to whatever happens to me. I have pointers I look for in a potential mate (only 3 mind- too many leads to failure), I know what interests me (simple things mainly) and what I dont like (rollercoasters that turn you upside down and baked beans - yuk!) but Im also open to new ideas or experiences. And somewhere out there is the man to share those things with me. Maybe I've just found him, maybe I haven't. Who knows, either way I won't let it get me down. I am after all a bouncing ball - I will always bounce back, maybe not so high each time, but always with a smile and a story to tell after each encounter. Talking of encounters I worked out how many men I have had dates with this year alone! wow! Next blog I promise to list them (or their alter egos to save their identities) and briefly explain why they werent my prince.